“That’s the problem with putting others first; you’ve taught them that you come second.” ~Unknown
For the past few weeks I have been doing just that…neglecting the one person that matters most to myself. That person is ME. Yes I have been putting my needs and wants on the back burner and allowing others’ needs and wants to take a front row seat. Of course while I was in the midst of tending to everyone I was ignoring how I felt. I said YES to everyone and everything but myself. I am finally realizing how truly detrimental that actually is.
I wrote the stress off as how busy I was because I had so much on my plate. When really it was the stress of me overdoing it and not taking care of myself. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love helping others and being there for them but I have a tendency of diving all the way in and I forget to come up for air. I need to learn how to assist in doses and when I am not assisting, I should be recharging so that I can be ready to assist again.
I was sick all last week. What (I thought) started out as a cold, had not yet gone away, it had gone to my sinuses. I hadn’t stopped. I was constantly been on the move. For some odd reason, I can’t allow myself to STOP and RECHARGE. I’m in the love with the idea of always being available for everyone at all times. Boy, do I learn the hard way.
Last week, I forgot to do things for myself, I forgot to say NO to others and YES to myself. I forgot to take care of ME. I feel as though if I were to sit out and watch from the sidelines that I would somehow be indefinitely inadequate. In reality and outside of my (sometimes) twisted way of thinking on certain topics, that is not at all true. If I give my body time to recharge, I will be able to get back in the game quicker. I will be healthier and stronger.
Instead, I stay in the game. I do things that are out of character for me. I eat horribly and skip workouts. I scale back on commitments. All because I am not 110% and I am not on my A-Game, as I usually am. I am very hard-headed and stubborn and feel as though a large animal needs to sit on my lap and pin me down so that I do not move until I am well again. The game will not stop while I am sitting on the sideline. The game always has subs that can fill in while you are out recharging. That is what I am realizing. Ask for help when needed, especially when you do not want it, for that is when you need it the most.
I am happy to report that after a long weekend of resting and pampering myself, I have recovered and I back! I finally said YES to myself and I look forward to saying YES to myself more often so that I am not sitting on the sidelines anymore ;).
I hope you all had a long, fun and relaxing Memorial Day Weekend!